One is the Loneliest Number
by rejivar
Summary: This story picks up as Lily and James are entering their 5th year. Tensions arise between friends that complicate relationships. And yet, amid all of this, the Marauders still manage to squeeze a few pranks in. Enjoy!


**Chapter One: Soaked Friends and Perverted Midget Boys**

Disclaimer: I know, I don't own Lily or the Marauders, and I don't claim to, either. However, steal my other characters and your head will be mine! You have been forewarned! Muahahaha!

* * *

Lily Evans tried to heave her suitcase up into the compartment, but to no avail. Panting, she examined the red welts appearing on her hands. She flexed her digits and grabbed her suitcase, making one last futile attempt to move it. It budged only an inch.

"Need a hand?"

The voice came from a messy-haired figure standing directly behind her. Lily spun around, eyeing the boy with a slightly disdainful air.

"Not from you!" she spat at him.

She grabbed the strap of her bag and began to drag it into the compartment, slamming the door after her. She sat down, adjusting her auburn hair. Lily liked its style but disliked the color. Her vivid red hair stood out among all the blondes and brunettes at Hogwarts, therefore making her an obvious target for Slytherin bullies. She groaned at the thought of facing another year of taunting. Not that Slytherins were the only people who teased her. Lily remembered the messy-haired boy with disgust. James Potter. He always looked for ways to embarrass her.

Then suddenly the compartment door opened, and in stumbled a hazelnut-haired girl with shy brown eyes carrying a black carpetbag.

"Hey Lils!" the girl exclaimed. She then glanced at Lily's face and asked concernedly, "What's wrong?"

Lily looked up at her best friend and fellow Gryffindor. "Oh, it's nothing Chels."

Chelsea Morris stared back at her with a raised eyebrow. "Nothing's never nothing to you," she said as she took a seat across from Lily. "Tell the truth!"

"Fine. It's about James."

"I knew it."

"If you knew, why did you have to ask me?"

"Just checking, that's all. What awful thing did he do to you know?"

"He offered to 'help' me with my luggage," Lily said, gesturing towards her bag.

"Oh, sounds terrible, Lils. I mean, James trying to help you! Quite traumatic," said the girl sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

"Chels!"

"What? You need to learn how accept help sometimes, even if it's from a person you're not to fond of."

"I know, I know, stop lecturing! But I know it was just another plan to trip me up somehow and make me look like a complete idiot."

"That's highly unlikely, even for James," Chelsea declared skeptically.

Lily's guard went up almost automatically. James wasn't biased in his pranks, except that the majority were directed towards the Slytherins. He made a point in pulling a prank on at least one of the Gryffindor girls every night or so. Why would she, Lily, be an exception?

"What do you m-," Lily started.

Sensing that she had aroused Lily's suspicion, Chelsea interjected and immediately changed the subject. "Have you seen Jovi anywhere? I've been looking all over for her."

"I'm right here."

Both Lily and Chelsea turned and stared at their normally-happy friend. Jovianna Ryan was standing in the doorway of the compartment, blonde hair dripping, clothes soaked and clinging to her body. Her dark blue eyes were alight with anger and vengeance.

"That Sirius Black! I'll bloody kill him, I swear to the Deus I will!"

Suppressing giggles, Lily questioned her friend. "What in God's name happened to you!"

"Black thought it would be a good idea to 'welcome back' dear Bellatrix by pelting her with enchanted water balloons. But nooo, "to obvious," he said. So he decided to change his target." she explained through clenched teeth. She then spread her arms out. "Guess who he chose instead!"

"You, obviously," stated Chels, nonchalantly.

Lily sighed as she pulled out her wand, made a complicated little wave, and pointed it at Jovi. Hot air began to stream out of the tip, drying her soaking clothes.

"Thanks," muttered Jovianna, taking a seat next to Lily.

"So," asked Lily, "how were your summers? Mine was pretty dull. Mainly studying and babysitting."

"Oh, mine was wonderful!" gushed Chels, "Lithuania can be so beautiful in the summer. I took loads of pictures!"

"I'm glad at least one of us had a descent summer. Mine was absolutely terrible! And all because of that awful foreign exchange student!" exclaimed Jovi, clearly disgusted. "That little twerp followed me around wherever I went! He would not leave me alone! Trust me, I tried."

"Oh, come on, stop exaggerating Jovi. It can't have been _that_ bad…"

"Oh really? You try having a 4'10" midget as your entourage, asking you the dumbest 'What if?' questions in the thickest accent you've ever heard for the whole summer! Plus, it was dead hot! I had to wear a sweater everyday 'cause he kept staring at my chest when ever he could! Erlack…" Jovi made a face that showed her utmost revulsion for the boy. "And can you believe he was our age!"

"Eh, you have a point there…"

"I have a point!" Jovi called out, at the brink of hysterics. "Of course I have a point! That midget almost drove me insane!"

"Almost?" Lily murmured to Chels.

"Now that's what I call traumatic," Chelsea muttered back.

Before Jovi could start on one of her endless rants, Lily interrupted. Otherwise they'd be hearing about Midget Boy for the rest of the train ride. If someone could steam for that long, it was Jovianna Morris.

"Is he coming to Hogwarts?" inquired Lily.

"Oh, no, he's not coming, thank the Deus! He went back to Russia about a week ago." Jovi then contorted her face and hollered, "AH, MOTHERLAND!"

Making people laugh was one of Jovi's gifts. Although the phrase she shouted had not been particularly funny, the face she made while doing so was absolutely hysterical. In moments, all three girls were clutching their stomachs, laughing. Lily had even fallen off her seat and was rolling on the floor. In a few minutes, peace was restored. Jovi was still giggling softly and Chels had to wipe away the tears falling from her eyes.

Trying to gather herself and maintain composure, Lily continued the conversation. "Well, then that problem's solved. We won't have to worry about any perverted Midget Boys tailing us this year at Hogwarts!"

"_Au contraire_!" Chelsea spoke. "They may not be midgets, quite opposite really, but they still tail us!" She looked pointedly at her friends. "The Marauders!"


End file.
